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02/12/13 - 6 comments

Dating is such an exhausting task, and the chance of a relationship hangs in the balance of this first social meeting. Have you considered things you do subconsciously or out of nerves may in fact turn your date 'off'? Here are a few things that on the first date you should absolutely steer clear from doing if you would like a second date to occur.

1. No chit-chat of the ex
If you spontaneously decide to take me out for a delightful dinner and the conversation and wine are flowing freely - the last thing I want to hear is how much of a 'bitch' your ex is for 'running off with her boss' this indicates you have not go over this horrendous event in your life and still love her, or if you say, "we used to come here all the time" it would put me straight off my food, and question whether or not you are ready for a new relationship. Both of these are unacceptable for the first date, will leave you unquestionably without a second and have me running for my life out the back door.

2. Playing on your phone
I'm sure it would be right of me to assume that if you took the time to ask me out on a date, it was because you wanted to give me your undying attention for a few hours, so it is such a turn off when I hear the Nokia ringtone brrringggg. 1) Why is your phone not on silent? And 2) what an insult! A ringing phone indicates a lack of respect to me (a date who you are trying to impress) but also others in the restaurant. If you burst out "Oh my goodness! How utterly embarrassing, I'm so sorry I thought it was on silent" I am likely to be able to get over this momentary hiccup. But if you have the audacity to say, "one second babe" and answer the call, which must be a dear friend as every other word is "mate", I'm sorry but you are not a keeper.

3. If you smell
Personal hygiene is a must, and all you men may tut, but when I asked my girlfriends what would be a 'turn off', they all screamed out unanimously "he must not smell!" And this doesn't mean us women believe you haven't showered but sometimes we have reason to believe you haven't brushed your teeth for a few weeks, which means unfortunately you won't have the golden ticket that grants you a kiss good night. Also gentlemen as I'm telling you to brush your teeth, if you use foul language make sure you wash your mouth out with soap and water. On the first date I would not wish every other word to be a profanity as I'd be terrified your 'little swimmers' already know every word under the sun.

4. Lateness
If a man is late on the first date, it shows me clear as day he doesn't give a toss. Being bang on time on the first date is a big must, and you must not and shall not be late. The reason it is such an ultimate turn off is that I will assume from the start you will never be on time, and instantly believe I have been stood up so when you do causally turn up fifteen minutes late I will be pretty embarrassed and downright peeved off. Being a woman and a woman that is always on time, in fact normally early I expect the same from you. If our dinner is booked for 7oclock, I would expect you there at 7, not five past. So when I find myself noticing your perfect tan in December, beautifully manicured nails and bleach blonde hair, no sodding wonder you were late!

5. If you dominate the conversation or only talk about yourself
You don't want to be the guy that brags intentionally loud for everyone to hear. Remember men, there are two of us on this date, and even though I haven't climbed Kilimanjaro, swam with sharks or even survived a black widow spider bite I'm pretty sure if you let me get a word in edgeways, you'd find me interesting. A date is to get to know the other candidate not overpower her and make her want to hide under her menu. Gentlemen, you must understand it is not ideal to intimidate with all your wonderful achievements. It would be a better idea to ask "What have you done recently that you're extremely proud of?" and if she replies with "I've abseiled down the Eiffel Tower" you can then let on that you too are a crazy dare devil. However if she replies with "I've just house trained my Chiwawa!" maybe you should keep quiet for a while longer...

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by: lovelylisa
on: 17/12/2013 - 10:04am

this is soooo funny and true!!

by: GPz1100
on: 29/12/2013 - 12:13am

Great, I'll use this to put someone off if I don't fancy them!!!!!! Just kidding.

by: vicarol
on: 02/01/2014 - 09:42pm

All very true. Especially the thing about being on time. I have too many dates in the past that never made it past the first one purely because they couldn't be bothered to show up on time, on the right day or even at all! If you aint gonna show then be polite and let me know!!

by: lucys_blog
on: 04/01/2014 - 05:29pm

GPz1100 .. Women will run a mile if you show ANY of these traits! Clearly you have a sense of humour though - always a bonus with us ladies!

by: lucys_blog
on: 04/01/2014 - 05:43pm

vicarol - You wouldn't believe how many dates I have been on when the significant other has decided to rock up 10 minutes late! It's just a down right no no, and sets the relationship off to a bad start!

by: joanne0403
on: 06/01/2014 - 04:03pm

what about when the womans late? i'm late for everything ha ha